My son is turning 32 in May. He is an addict of most everything that is out there and he has been in and out of jail since he was 21 years old. My son is such a smart, likable person. He is funny and has so much to offer as a human being - except that he can't, or won't, quit using. We have given him everything we have
thinking that if we just do this or that, that it would get him clean. We got this great idea that if we sent him to Greece to live with my husband's relatives, he wouldn't be around the environment that led to drugs. We put ourselves in so much debt that we eventually lost our house only to find that in Greece he began using heroin and the money spent on his living expenses was what allowed him to buy his drugs. We have been on a roller coaster for so many
years. He goes to jail and gets clean while he's in there. We give him a place to stay until he can get his life together, then he steals everything we have to buy drugs.
He's getting out of jail in a month and I have already told him he's on his own - I won't put money on the books for him, I won't pay phone
time and I won't give him a roof over his head when he gets out. He knows where every shelter is and he knows where he can go get food - this is how he was surviving when we thought we were paying his rent and giving him money for food.
I am trying very hard to be strong and to keep my resolve but he breaks my heart every time he asks me to give him money. I love him so much and it hurts so badly.
Hang in there, dear one; you've got lots of us fellow parents for company, facing the very same issues.
Next time he asks you for help of any kind, try thinking of it this way: that anything you
buy for him or pay for him is actually YOU BUYING HIS DRUGS. If you keep that
thought firmly in the front of your mind, you'll be able to say "no" with love, compassion, and steady resolve!
Sending you lots of love and a big hug ~ Cheryl
thinking that if we just do this or that, that it would get him clean. We got this great idea that if we sent him to Greece to live with my husband's relatives, he wouldn't be around the environment that led to drugs. We put ourselves in so much debt that we eventually lost our house only to find that in Greece he began using heroin and the money spent on his living expenses was what allowed him to buy his drugs. We have been on a roller coaster for so many
years. He goes to jail and gets clean while he's in there. We give him a place to stay until he can get his life together, then he steals everything we have to buy drugs.
He's getting out of jail in a month and I have already told him he's on his own - I won't put money on the books for him, I won't pay phone
time and I won't give him a roof over his head when he gets out. He knows where every shelter is and he knows where he can go get food - this is how he was surviving when we thought we were paying his rent and giving him money for food.
I am trying very hard to be strong and to keep my resolve but he breaks my heart every time he asks me to give him money. I love him so much and it hurts so badly.
Hang in there, dear one; you've got lots of us fellow parents for company, facing the very same issues.
Next time he asks you for help of any kind, try thinking of it this way: that anything you
buy for him or pay for him is actually YOU BUYING HIS DRUGS. If you keep that
thought firmly in the front of your mind, you'll be able to say "no" with love, compassion, and steady resolve!
Sending you lots of love and a big hug ~ Cheryl
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